Once again, The Onion is far ahead of me in terms of all the possible ramifications of being a devout Christian and being saved. It does my heart good to know that while there are undoubtedly people like this that exist, I'm the reviled one who's going to hell for being atheist. I tells ya, there are tons of stuff that I'd like to write off, a la tax style, by declaring my love for all forgiving, all loving pudding...er, Jesus, but, I'll just settle for copious amounts of science.
